my brain feels like it's overloading
and saying, "oh you think you know self loathing?"
but i've got great methods of coping, countless bowls i'm smoking
and friends who'll keep me from strolling into traffic
but friends leave and climb up social rungs and when the smoke hits my lungs
it doesn't take too long till i'm right back at step one
so i will call you every night when i'm freaking the fuck out
you're probably used to it by now, you've probably got your script out:

"when you go to sleep they will cleanse you of your sins
they will let you start again, you'll remember all your friends
and all the time that you guys killed or that you spent"
you always had this way with words that got me back into my head

but do i need that?
i don't need that
butcouldyoupleasestayonthephone?

but i guess enough is enough
one more thought before you hung up
you talked about a boy who asked for too much
i didn't fucking listen, i sat and i shrugged

"so when you soon wake up they will know just what you did
they'll be coming for your head, they will tear your soul to shreds
so i suggest you run and hide while you still can"
maybe not the words i wanted, but i've got this blood on my hands
and i can't clean them